pfc_rat (pfc_rat) wrote,

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Reference: Man becomes pregnant again

So, to sum up, a pre-op trans man got pregnant because his wife is infertile because of cancer. Insert media circus, Oprah, the View, cover of magazines, etc..

So the internet is teeming with articles about him, and the reaction is one of the following:

1. I'm not a homophobe, but think this is disgusting and immoral. Not a homophobe though.
2. This isn't a man, she's really a girl, you can't be a man unless you do everything manly, and live your life the way I think you should. (apparently wearing pants would instantly make you a man... until you take them off, and then I guess you can be a woman again, but only for a while)
(apparently something that happens 300,000 times a day is "miraculous" and one person doing it differently invalidates the entire thing... sounds like the crap arguments against gay marriage)
4. Other trans men have already done this. Old news, don't care.

Now, to take these one at a time. #1 - transphobia seems to be WAY more prevalent than homophobia. Granted, there are far fewer trans people than gay people, and even the FTM is less common than the MTF, so you're dealing with a minority of a minority of a minority, which is marginalized to begin with, so you're pretty much fucked from the start. Other than the fact that a pregnancy is involved (which is now some ridiculous trend... thanks Angelina), I doubt many trans people would ever get this kind of media attention. Not to mention many in the trans community seem pissed about this, because they feel that this man does not represent them, their views, or their struggle for recognition. It seems like people define themselves so strongly by their gender that they can't even understand what gender issues are.

For myself, while I can't claim to understand any of the gender struggles and identity issues that trans people must go through, being very boyish in many regards, not playing with dolls, being in the army, all that stuff, I can understand a bit of what it means to not fit into the role that society expects you to play. Maybe after the gay community gains more ground that people will realize that the T in LGBT deserves tolerance and acceptance as well.

For #2 - this is the same crap that people tell me because I'm not having kids; "well you're not really a woman then." Well then they forgot to send me my penis in the mail, because I sure would like to pee standing up from time to time. Or back when women wanted jobs, or to own property, or *gasp* the right to vote. As if a single item of clothing, belief, or right was the sole defining characteristic of a gender. Why do people think they have the right to tell someone that they have to live their lives based on a particular set of standards? In every community I've encountered, I've always heard people say; well if you don't ________ then you're not really __________. The kink community, the atheist community, the pagan community, the parent community, the childfree community... like there's a manual on how to be something, but if you miss a single step, then you're somehow wrong.

#3 - The "miraculous" babies. Yes, pregnancy and childbirth suck. It's hard on your body, labour intensive (pun intended), and difficult. Nevertheless, it happens 300,000 times every single day. Walk down the street and you will run into plenty of people who have been born. Women in grass huts give birth on straw mats by themselves in the dark, without the benefits of blood tests, ultrasounds, amniocenteses, epidurals, surgeons, episiotomies, surgeons, or even someone helping them out. By calling childbirth a miracle, it diminishes the status of the few things that are genuinely miraculous. Babies are no more a miracle than people are, and considering how many murderers, rapists, child molesters, thieves, and members of the Westboro Baptist Church there are, I would tend to say that people are not miracles. Sure, it's difficult and it sucks, but so does being in the army (most of the time), but that's not a miracle either.

#4 - Pretty much my opinion.
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